Writer 1: Can you believe I haven’t heard back yet about my submission to that journal? Even worse, they ran an article almost exactly the same as my piece in their recent edition!
Writer 2: Jerks.
Writer 1: I’m sure they took my idea. Their loss – I could’ve written it so much better.
Writer 2: So what are you going to do next?
Writer 1: I’m thinking of changing a character in my latest short story to look like the editor, a character which makes a nasty end.
Writer 2: Nice. Justice.
Writer 1: Exactly.
Writer 2: What’s the story about again?
Writer 1: There is an Ebola virus breakout in Carlton, wiping out half of the publishers of Melbourne within a week.
Writer 2: Wow. So plausible.
Writer 1: I feel so much better now.
*
Blogger 1: Can you believe I haven’t heard back regarding my pitch for that guest post yet? Even worse, this morning they did their own post on almost the exact same idea!
Blogger 2: Jerks.
Blogger 1: I’m sure they took my idea. Their loss – I could’ve written it so much better.
Blogger 2: So what are you going to do next?
Blogger 1: I’m thinking of setting aside an evening to write a series of cryptic passive aggressive Tweets explaining how irritated I am that will make no sense to people. Then they will have to DM me to ask what the problem is.
Blogger 2: Nice. Brave.
Blogger 1: Exactly. And they’ll be on my side.
Blogger 2: What if that doesn’t work?
Blogger 1: I shall write a post of my own and link to everyone else who has written posts about the subject I wanted to – everyone except this blogger’s post.
Blogger 2: Oh, snap.
Blogger 1: I feel so much better now.
