How to procrastinate in 13 easy steps.


[Daytime. The kids are both napping; a rarity.]

1. You set up the laptop on the kitchen table.

2. You open your media player and play a couple episodes of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, even though you could’ve played them while children were awake – although you should think twice about it, for the swearing – but you forgot you’d even downloaded them until now.

3. You then open a book you’re reading desperately so you can then read the ten others you’ve got waiting, so you can return those to the library, to get more.

4. You can’t remember what work it was you were supposed to be doing.

5. You open up your documents folder on the laptop, and spend a few minutes going through a few old your old documents from a few years ago, a few novel manuscripts, because you’re both a glutton for punishment and primed for desperation/ reparation of spirit. You wished you had time to work on them properly but it wasn’t these you set up the computer to start with.

6. You open a file for your article/ non-fiction ideas and go on the Internet to do some research.

7. Instead of hitting ‘Google’ though, you open your favourites folder for, like, the 20th time that day to check your site meter. You’ve checked it so much, you know exactly who’s visited, right down to their place of residence and what ISP they use.

8. You think, hey, while I’m doing blogging stuff, I’ll do the rounds on all my favourites.

9. You spend the next half hour reading, commenting, and being taken around a linking rainbow of choice and interest.

10. You look at the clock and hate yourself for getting sidetracked.

11. You consider getting some sort of software that limits the time you can actually spend on the Internet.

12. You think that that is for people with no self-control, or for people under the age of ten, of which you are neither, so you snap yourself out of it, and shut down Explorer.

13. You then notice you’ve got a new email. You read that, and realise you’ve got a few others to respond to. You do.

You then hear one of the children is awake and you swear to yourself because your time has been frittered away. That’s what procrastination looks like.

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Karen Andrews is the creator of Karen Andrews. This is one of the most established and well-respected parenting blogs in the country and is a two-time finalist in the Best Australian Blogs competition. She is also an author, award-winning writer, poet, editor and publisher at Miscellaneous Press. Is an exercise junkie (when she finds the time).


  1. Shannon says

    HA! Sounds like my day…everyday! That’s all I have been doing today. :( Oh well now it is time to comment on TT’s so, I CAN’T possibly log off now! Have a great weekend!

  2. impworks says

    Your list could almost be another excuse on my list of excuses for not commenting on other bloggers blogs.

    Great list :-)

  3. Tink says

    Haha, great list! I don’t have kids, but I recognize a lot nevertheless!
    My TT lists 13 things I can’t (or don’t want to…) live without.

  4. Moving Mama says

    We are living the same life across the world from each other – I can so relate – when I hear that first stirrings of my toddler waking I realize how much time I wasted away…

    Janine @ Moving Mama

  5. Tracey says

    Funny how we can all relate, isn’t it?!! Perhaps it’s a prerequisite for bloggers.

    What is really dangerous is when you do that over your whole day because your kids are old enough to ignore. (And they go to school from 9-3!)

  6. Jenny McB says

    This was so true! I am glad that I didn’t have a computer when my kids were this young…bad enough now.
    Do you find your self making deals with yourself to not go on the computer? Great list.

  7. mcewen says

    Whilst I’d like to give you a good slapping for wasting your time, strangely I remember the napping days [brief though they were]
    The trouble with napping [and your sound in a similar vein] it that napping is unpredictable – will they / won’t they settle? If they do how long for? Will there be any overlapping time [real free time]? As a result because it’s either elastic or non existent it’s hard to do anything constructive.
    If you start something constructive that’s guaranteed to make everyone wake up. If you hover, they sleep.

  8. Gloria says

    Excluding the ‘children’ part since I don’t have any…are you a psychic? Those words are eerily true! Happy TT!

  9. MothersLife says

    Dear me. That is so me! It is no wonder my ironing is still sitting on the couch (been there for days) wating for me.

  10. Dijea says

    That was a much needed laugh. We might have purchased our brains at the same place, its like reading my own thoughts.

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